A single mom in her 50s is asking Reddit users via “Am I the Asshole” if she’s a jerk for only wanting her daughter to inherit her home when she dies. Here’s the full story:
U/GiGiGi3 starts her dilemma by explaining that she “got very lucky” when she bought her Bay Area house for around $230,000 about 30 years ago because it is worth over a million dollars now.
“I have a 23-year-old daughter Camila who grew up in that house, and she moved out last year to go live with her boyfriend. I’ve never explicitly told my daughter, ‘The house will be yours,’ nor has she asked anything about it, but it is sort of common sense — that’s my daughter. Who else would I give it to?”
In the thread, she elaborated, sharing, “There are two homes in the neighborhood that are owned by lower middle-class people — me and a neighbor who’s been here as long as I have. Otherwise, our neighbors are engineers and software developers. The Bay Area is simply unaffordable if you’re not in tech. My daughter is a hairstylist.”
Well, u/GiGiGi3 has had a fiancé, Steven, for two years who has two young kids in elementary school. “He has joint custody. I adore them, and I’m excited to help raise them. Steven and I don’t have a ton in the bank so a pre-nup seemed silly if it weren’t for the house. I told him that I was ready to combine finances and plan long-term with him, but I wanted a prenup agreement just for the house. It’s a non-negotiable for me that my daughter inherits the house.”
Steven was not happy with her about the house, however. “He said that the million dollars split three ways is enough for all three kids to get a head-start in life. I disagree. I paid 80% of the mortgage by myself, and Camila is my only child. She can have her dream life (working as a hairstylist, living in the Bay Area) with this house but will be unhappy (have to move out to a less desirable area) if it’s split.”
“I spoke to Camila about this, and she agrees that she should get the house and said she always planned on inheriting it, just like I always planned on giving it to her,” u/GiGiGi3 concluded, asking if she’s an asshole.
Here’s what Reddit users are saying:
“Not the asshole. He is demanding that his kids receive an equal share of the home you paid for and raised your daughter in decades before he even existed for you. That’s absurd. If you’re going to marry this man and merge finances with him, you need to speak to an attorney. If you have to go to great lengths to protect your child from his greed and entitlement, make sure marriage and merging finances is something you really want to do with this person.” —SnakesCantWearPants
“The house was purchased 30 years ago, long before you met Steven, and it is your separate property. I would not add him to your house deed. I would consult an attorney versed in estate law. I have my eyebrows raised that a fiancé of two years thinks his two children should get an equal share of your house that is your separate property, one that you have paid the mortgage on for nearly 30 years. Please, protect yourself and contact an attorney.” —Babybleu
“I have lived in the Bay Area. One-third of that house will not go far in giving Camila the future you and she want her to have. You are passing your good fortune and hard work on to your daughter. Makes perfect sense to me. Between Steven and his ex, they have the right and responsibility to provide for their two children as best they can.” —abcwva
“NTA, that’s your house. I think the prenup is a fantastic idea as it is your investment; you shouldn’t risk losing it if things go south. I am just floored he thinks his kids are entitled to 2/3 of the value. WTFF?!?” —JakBurten
“Lady, you’ve been with that man all of two years. You better stop playing. This isn’t even a question. That house belongs to YOU and should go to YOUR daughter. With all due respect, fuck them kids. NTA.” —Anonymous
Well, the votes are unanimous! What do you think? Have you or someone you know ever been in a similar situation? Let us know in the comments!
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